The ongoing battle

Going back to 2021 and taken a moment to reflect on my journey, looking at present day im still trapped in the nightmare, things are lot more clearer as i have a great care team, the same thing still remains im to complex to fit into the normal box. On a postive it has taught me so much so about myself, become healthier.

My advice to you is to find that spark and follow your dreams and your heart life is so short no matter how hard the journey may be

Four years ago, my love-hate relationship with doctors in New Zealand began during a frustrating doctor's appointment. While we are fortunate to have most healthcare services through hospitals for free and affordable doctors and prescription costs, there is a significant issue. In the past, we had a close relationship with a family doctor who knew us well and took the time to care for us. Now, I feel like just another number in the system, leading me to switch doctors frequently. will not just settle with a doctor who thinks googling my symptoms are ok, just loose weight, we give you some pain medications and you be fine, we just dont know what wrong with you, do some exercise.

I've faced my fair share of challenges – tantrums, tears, and moments of feeling like giving up – but there's a fire within me that keeps me going. I'm determined to advocate for the right medical care and raise awareness about invisible conditions that profoundly impact people's lives. I'm not alone; there are others like me who are speaking up and asking similar questions.

Throughout my four-year journey, I've seen five doctors and had to seek advocacy to be heard and make progress towards remblance of a normal life. My goal is simple: to manage my pain and conditions and seek understanding for why my body behaves this way. Despite being hypothyroid, my doctors have yet to find the right thyroid doses, affecting my weight, temperature regulation, and organ functions. I've been told I have fibromyalgia without clear guidance on how to manage it, and my concerns about endometriosis have been overlooked by gynecologists. Additionally, I have autoimmune issues with no clear diagnosis.

The impact on my life has been immense; the sudden shift from a healthy, energetic lifestyle to grappling with various health issues has taken a toll on me mentally. One moment I was enjoying life, watching my kids grow up, going on road trips, and having fun with friends, and the next moment, everything changed.woke up in a nightmare and im trapped and im spinning around and im asking for help and no one can here me or help me and i dont know when the nightmare will stop.

So I got this wee spark left in me i will work again so ill use this time to heal me and learn crazy ways of dealing with this nightmare and hope that i will find my answers and i get that one doctor who is kind and compassionate and wont give up on me and to use this time to reach out to people, create my tool box to get me through the mental crap, and try some new things and upkill my skills to better myself as a support worker,watch my grandson grow and most of have some adventures and put me first.